How to Fake Confidence (Until It Becomes Real)

You want to show up with confidence, but inside, you feel anything but.

Maybe your voice shakes when you speak.

Or your mind spirals with thoughts like: 

• “What if they judge me?” 
• “Do I even belong here?”
• “Am I good enough to speak up?”

So you think: Maybe I just need to fake it.

But how do you do that without being… well, fake?

Good news: Faking confidence doesn’t mean pretending to be someone you’re not. It means learning how to carry yourself in a way that quiets self-doubt long enough for your real power to come through.

And when done right? It can help you to become the confident version of you. But be wary so you don’t develop false confidence.

Let’s get into it!

P.S. If you want to build real confidence from the inside out, then also sign up for my free confidence-building email series.

What does faking confidence mean?

Faking confidence means intentionally choosing confident behaviors, even when you don’t feel confident inside.

It’s not lying. 

It’s not pretending you have all the answers.

It’s acting as if you trust yourself – so your brain can catch up.

Think of it like muscle memory. You’re teaching your nervous system what it feels like to show up strong, grounded, and open – even when your inner critic is yelling.

It’s a temporary bridge between who you are now and the confident version you’re becoming.

Why faking confidence actually works

Your body and brain are in constant communication.

When you shift how you act, you shift how you feel.

Faking confidence works because:

• It interrupts self-doubt loops: Giving your brain a new focus (your breath, your posture, your voice tone) helps stop spiraling thoughts.
• It activates your “competence” energy: By speaking up or holding eye contact, you start feeling more capable.
• It crushes fear and builds self-trust: Each moment you show up, even nervously, is proof that you’re stronger than your fear.

Benefits of faking confidence

• You speak up when you usually shrink back
• You leave a strong first impression
• You learn that discomfort ≠ danger
• You get through awkward situations with more ease
• You start building actual confidence from experience
• You show yourself: “Hey, I can do hard things.”

7 Fast ways to fake your way to confidence

Here’s a list of quick tools that you can use to fake more confidence:

1. Stand tall: Roll your shoulders back. Lift your chest. Uncross your arms. It might feel weird at first, but your posture directly affects how confident you feel. It’s the easiest hack for confidence.
2. Slow your breath Shallow, fast breathing tells your brain you’re in danger. Try this: inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 6. It instantly calms your nervous system.
3. Make eye contact (even briefly): You don’t have to stare anyone down. Just meet their eyes for a moment before looking away. It shows presence and builds trust.
4. Use your voice intentionally: Speak slightly slower and lower than usual. It signals groundedness, even if you’re nervous inside.
5. Ask questions instead of over-talking: Confidence isn’t about dominating a convo. It’s about connection and collaboration. Curiosity shows you’re engaged, not insecure.
6. Use a power phrase or anchor: Have a quiet mantra or phrase you repeat before walking into a room: “I’ve got this.” “I’m safe here.” “I matter.” It helps you shift into your stronger self.
7. Move a little bit: Shake out your hands, stretch your body, take a quick walk, or jump up and down before entering a space. Movement helps release tension and resets your energy.

Avoid these common traps

• Overcompensating like talking too much, bragging about your past or achievements, or being aggressive or overly defensive.
• Copying someone else’s vibe instead of owning your own energy. Avoid sucking up to someone to get their validation. It won’t work.
• Beating yourself up when the nerves come back. The nerves will come back and that’s okay. In some situation, you can even release the pressure by telling everyone how you feel.
• Waiting until you feel ready before taking action. You won’t ever feel fully ready. Take a decision fast, act immediately, and reiterate. That’s the real game fo life.

You don’t need to be fearless.

The key to confidence is showing up – again, and again, and again. 

How to start faking it?

Next time you’re walking into a situation that triggers self-doubt:

1. Pick one body cue to practice (like posture or breathing)
2. Choose one anchor phrase to ground yourself.
3. Remind yourself: I don’t have to be perfect. Just present.

Even the most confident people feel doubt sometimes.

What makes the difference? 

They take massive action anyway.

Do you want to build real foundational self-confidence? 

Then check out my course: Insideout Confidence Mastery Blueprint. Within 2 weeks, you’ll learn how to feel good in your own skin, stop comparing yourself to others, and create the life you actually want.