To enjoy success and happiness in your life, you need self-mastery.
Think about it:
Many people that are successful on the outside, feel stressed and unsatisfied on the inside. There are too many stories of those who (seemingly) made it that ended in a tragedy.
If you want a great life, self-mastery should be one of your top priorities.
In this article, youâll learn what personal mastery is, the secret ingredients that are necessary, and the 6 steps to master yourself.
Letâs dive in!
What is self-mastery?
Self-mastery says it all: itâs the pursuit of achieving mastery over yourself. Itâs the skill that leads to more self-control, self-discipline, and self-confidence.
In general, personal mastery focuses on the following aspects:
- Physical
- Emotional
- Mental
- Spiritual
Improving each of these areas has a positive impact on your life. And when you feel great, you radiate that positive energy and are also more likely to build a better future for yourself.
But hereâs a catch: Self-mastery is not a result.
Achieving personal mastery is not about reaching a destination. When you embark on this journey, it lasts forever.
Itâs the process that matters.
Think about it like going to the gym. If you go consistently, youâll keep getting stronger. But if you donât go for a while, youâll lose some muscle and strength.
Mastering yourself is worth the effort and time.
Why pursue personal mastery?
Imagine the following scenario:
You feel 100% at ease with yourself and the world around you. Youâre also pursuing a path that you set out for yourself, not one that feels forced upon you. You are in control over your life and your destiny.
Where most people let life happen to them, you make life happen.
Do you like that situation?
Well, thatâs exactly what self-mastery will do for you.
Not only that but success without personal mastery can become frustrating. Imagine how confusing it is once you have success yet still donât feel successful. When you should be happy but you are not. What do you do then?
Itâs the reason that so many stories of those who achieve success end up in alcohol or drug abuse. And thatâs not the definition of success in my book.
Self-mastery is not a luxury, itâs a necessity.
You need to become a master of your internal world to create whatever you desire in the external world. Developing inner success is essential to a good life.
5 Secrets for self-mastery
Great qualities make great people.
When you can turn a few of such qualities into habits, it can make a tremendous impact on the quality of your life.
The qualities we will discuss arenât only beneficial for self-mastery, but also for achieving greatness and success in any area of your life.
#1: Beginnerâs mind
A beginner’s mind means that you never stop wondering.
The trap is that the longer we do something, the more we feel like we should know it all. When we reach the status of being an expert, we feel like we need to have all the answers.
The ego gets involved and we stop questioning.
Though you may be right most of the time, a closed mind blocks you from learning anything new. And you might miss out on some important yet subtle nuances.
In other words: you become stuck in your ways.
Itâs the great Albert Einstein who once said: âThe important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.â
Letâs not forget these wise words.
#2: Knowledge-seeking
People from all walks of life have been successful in mastering themselves before us. And the beauty of today is that you have access to all that knowledge.
Whether itâs self-mastery or any other skill, you can learn about anything by accessing the internet or a public library. And doing so can shorten your learning curve.
Prioritizing some time in your day to extend your knowledge is an investment you wonât ever regret.
#3: Consistent effort
Knowledge alone isnât going to get you very far, though. You only reap the rewards when you put knowledge into practice so that you build wisdom.
But it isnât easy.
It requires consistent effort to keep showing up, even when you donât want to.
But only that which takes effort is truly worth going after.
That counts for becoming an NBA player or any other high-level athlete. It counts for building successful businesses and careers. And it also counts for achieving personal mastery.
Consistent effort is the secret to personal success in anything.
#4: Persistence
Most people can stay consistent for a little while, especially when itâs easy.
Think about being in the clouds during the first months of a relationship. In the gym, you gain muscle and lose fat quickly in the first couple of weeks. And the first month of opening your own business feels like you finally set yourself free.
Starting new things feels amazing.
The trouble comes a little later when the initial rush begins to wear off.
You start to see the shortcomings of the other person. You wonât gain muscles as fast any longer. Getting rid of any more fat feels impossible. And in business, you might struggle to get new clients or sell products while your savings are drying up.
Regardless of what you do, youâve got one guarantee in life:
You will face difficult challenges at some point.
You may get knocked down for weeks or even months. You may feel unmotivated to keep going and start wondering why you do what you do.
These times will happen.
The question then isnât how you can avoid this, but rather, how fast can you get back up and keep going?
Persistence is a necessary ingredient for long-term success.
#5: Patience
The final piece of the puzzle is patience.
If you stay patient in combination with the previous qualities, you are certain to achieve more mastery over yourself.
As long as you understand that mastery is a process, itâs also a lot easier to have patience. Especially when you notice that you enjoy many benefits along the way, not just at the end.
Though everyone makes it seem like you need results today, donât fall for the trap of wanting everything fast. Take your time to go through the process and focus on yourself.
If youâre in it for the long run, youâll enjoy the ride much more. And this will also increase your chances of personal success.
6 Steps to master yourself
Before you learn how to attain self-mastery, itâs important to stress again that mastery is all about the process. Personal mastery is a never-ending journey.
Itâs like a game where you can always level up and collect more wisdom and experience.
After all, there is no limit to self-control, confidence, and discipline. The more you focus on personal growth, the more of its benefits you will reap.
Thatâs why you should take the following steps not only once, but repeatedly.
Step 1: Self-discovery
No change happens without self-awareness.
Self-awareness is important to understand where your strong and weak points are. And you also need awareness to better navigate yourself through lifeâs challenges.
But also think about what you enjoy and whatâs most meaningful to you. When you focus your energy on your priorities, youâll find it much easier to stay consistent and enjoy the ride.
Learn how to begin your self-discovery journey, the starting point for self-mastery.
Step 2: Self-management
Most people learn a lot of practical things.
Growing up, we learn how to become responsible and sustain ourselves. School prepares you to do well in a job. And parents teach you how to treat other people well.
But almost no one teaches some key skills that anyone should learn.
And thatâs how to manage oneself.
How to deal with setbacks in life? What to do when you feel alone or upset? Better yet, how to deal with any of your feelings, emotions, and desires?
Schools donât teach self-control or emotional intelligence. Yet, these are such crucial skills that improve the quality of life for any individual and society as a whole.
Thatâs why Iâm shocked that I never learned this stuff.
Itâs only after I started reading personal development books in my 20s that I figured this out. And it improved the quality of my life more than I couldâve imagined.
Why did no one ever teach me these essential lessons?
If you cannot manage yourself, youâre going to have some serious challenges in life. Challenges that you can deal with a lot easier when you learn this essential skill.
Thatâs why Iâve created this guide on self-management.
Step 3: Self-motivation
Motivation is often a little bit of a buzzword.
But think about it like this: self-motivation is your ability to get out of bed in the morning.
Most people struggle to get up and prefer to snooze a couple of times. Others donât even want to go to bed because theyâre not excited for the next day.
The mass of men live lives of quiet desperation.
– Henry David Thoreau
Of course, you wonât feel pumped and excited all the time. Excitement is only part of the equation of motivation. The other part is your ability to do what you need to do, regardless of how you feel at the moment.
Can you motivate yourself into action even when you feel like snoozing?
Self-motivation ainât easy.
Even if you feel motivated some days, you will doubt yourself on others. The excitement you feel comes and goes in waves.
But consistency is the key to self-mastery.
And if you know how to motivate and discipline yourself, you have the power to create your destiny. Besides, once you did what you had to do, it also makes you feel great.
Step 4: Time management
Iâm always surprised to hear when people say theyâre not productive.
Because itâs simply not true.
Everyone can become more productive. Perhaps not in the same way as others. Or not as productive in comparison to people like Elon Musk.
But without a doubt, you can become a productive individual.
The problem is that people have the wrong expectation about productivity. When you ask them why it doesnât work for them, theyâll say something like: âIâve tried this productivity hack and it didnât workâŚâ.
But thatâs like saying, I tried working in administration and didnât like it – so that means there is no job that I will enjoy.
What might work well for others, might not work for you. And vice versa.
And thatâs also true for productivity.
Youâll have to try stuff for yourself. Test things to figure out where your strengths and preferences lie.
What works for you?
What are you good at?
Once again, this comes down to awareness. Itâs the essential step you need to better manage your time and increase your productivity.
Step 5: Energy management
Productivity and time management helps you to get more done, but only if you also account for energy management. Because if you donât, you soon find yourself exhausted or burned out.
Energy is everything in life.
So ask yourself: how do you feel most of the time?
Do you feel vibrant, energetic, and alive?
Or do you feel numbed down, drowsy, and disconnected?
If you experience the latter situation most of the time, you probably feel less alive and donât have a lot of fun either. When your energy is low, you wonât enjoy the full benefits that life has to offer.
If thatâs the case, here are three simple rules to feel better:
- Eat foods from which you can tell its source within 5 seconds.
- Go to bed at a fixed time and sleep plenty.
- Engage in some strength, endurance, and flexibility exercises.
Your energy is like the oil in a car. If you donât fill it up or refresh it once in a while, it will reduce the efficiency of the whole engine.
In other words, take care of yourself.
Step 6: Rinse and repeat
Congratulations, youâve gone through all the steps.
Now, the trick is to follow through on each of these steps consistently.
For example, you donât refill your energy just once. But rather, you want to make sure itâs something you do every once in a while.
Though it may sound obvious, the same is true for all the other steps. You need consistency to attain self-mastery.
But if you can manage to do that, youâll feel happier and it sets you up for success.
3 Books to develop self-mastery faster
Many books can improve your knowledge and develop self-mastery faster. But if youâre just starting on your journey, I always recommend the most valuable classics.
Here are 3 of my favorite books:
Whatâs next?
Self-mastery is the pursuit of achieving mastery over yourself, leading to more self-control, self-discipline, and self-confidence.
Key takeaways:
- Personal mastery is an ongoing journey of continuous self-improvement, not a destination.
- True self-mastery encompasses all important aspects of life including the physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual.
- Key qualities to obtain self-mastery include maintaining a beginner’s mind, pursuing wisdom and truth, and patience.
Dive deeper into the topic with the following resources:
- Tool: The 5-Minute Journal for consistent self-reflection
- Tool: Goals on Track is the goal-setting and task-management system I use to drive consistent action, personal growth, and goal success.
- Course: Complete Personal Development and Personal Transformation Course
Take action: Choose one of the qualities for self-mastery and commit to integrating it into your daily life.
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